Battlefield Earth

aka "QUEST FOR FIRE(POWER)" or "(ANTI)AMERICAN PSYCHLO"

(WARNING: SPOILER ALERT! But on the other hand, read on and save yourself 10 bucks and two hours of your life...)

John Travolta's wearying pet project

While wincing through John Travolta's wearying pet project Battlefield Earth this afternoon--and trying to keep my chin from falling into my chest, mind you--I found myself thinking of all of the bad press and glib mudslinging I've read and heard against this controversial S.F. "saga" for the past few week. Predictable, easy stabs at Scientology, of course, but also accusations of theft from past S.F. classics like Star Trek, Planet of the Apes, Logan's Run, and equally derivative blockbusters like the recent ID4 abounded. But there's one film that the critics seem to have forgotten (and perhaps, justifiably so) that Battlefield Earth evoked for me so vividly: 1982's Caveman vs. Spaceman cheese-a-thon: Yor, Hunter from the Future.

For those of you who have somehow missed this jewel of bargain basement S.F., both in terms of ideas and production values, here's a quickie synopsis. But first, we must go back--back! --to the early 1980s, before home video became a second-run house for major studio product and when hokey exploitation potboilers (and the odd genre gem) could still be programmed on double-bills in grindhouses and at drive-ins.

An absolute hoot from first frame to last

Antonio (Cannibal Apocalypse, Killer Fish) Margheriti's Yor, Hunter From The Future--number seven, btw, on Joe Bob Briggs' Drive In Ten Best List for 1982, right after Losin' It and before 1990: The Bronx Warriors (from the same director!)--stars former football star and Captain America Reb Brown as a bronze caveman with surfer 'do who leaves his home to uncover the meaning of the medallion around his neck. Battling several monsters and primitive settlements along the way, Yor eventually ends up on an island of technologically-advanced survivors of a nuclear disaster (the movie's BIG plot twist), and must fight the evil, long-haired Overlord who commands an army of androids and is, par for the course, hell-bent on world domination. It all ends in a big explosion and much inspirational blather.

An absolute hoot from first frame to last, "Yor" was a four-hour version for Italian television and for that, I'm eternally jealous.

Battlefield Earth certainly feels like four hours, and isn't remotely as entertaining as Yor's opening scene during any of its loooong 117 minutes.To me, as a faithful, long time aficionado of cinematic fantasy, this clunker creates something of a dismal precedent by offering absolutely NADA in terms of eye candy, cheap thrills, or even unintentional laughs. The best "bad movies"--the ones that DO make us laugh--are those that aspire to something higher, and fail miserably in the process. Witness Ed Wood Jr.'s plea for tolerance in his transvestite melodrama Glen Or Glenda (in reality, a deeply personal cry for help). Or Phil Tucker's allegory for the nuclear age in Robot Monster (basically, On The Beach with a gorilla in a deep sea diving helmet). Or Paul Verhoeven's expose of America's "underbelly" (and most of Elisabeth Berkley's anatomy) in Showgirls. What does producer Travolta hope for? That his "Terl The Psychlo" will become this year's "hottest Halloween costume". And that's almost a direct quote, folks [Battlefield Earth review]

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